Can death be defeated? The first answer is obvious: No! We are all doomed. No one escapes this inevitable disappearance. Nobody gets out of this life alive.

But that’s just the first answer. There are other answers and better than the elementary one, which only produces pessimism, frustration and defeat. There are other ways to deal with death. Facing it is also confronting it. Question her. Who are you?, what are you? Are you more than me? Do you exist before or after my disappearance? Or do you depend on me to exist?

Defeating death is an arrogant claim, but not impossible. To begin with, thousands of people who receive the fatal sentence of a serious diagnosis manage to overcome the disease and therefore they triumph over that mortal condemnation. It depends on the attitude. To prepare for combat, to love life and fight for it. To have a purpose. But I am not only referring to that partial defeat of death, to that postponement that is desirable and possible. Hardly a battle won because a day like that will come the day of farewell. I also mean defeat her completely. Absolutely. To defeat an enemy, a fear, a fear is to make it disappear, that fear disappear from your life. That the enemy does not exist anymore. It is possible not to fear death. I am not afraid of death.

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To defeat an enemy, a fear, a fear is to make it disappear, that fear disappear from your life. That the enemy does not exist anymore

Is your death your enemy? What are you afraid of, if you’re never going to meet her? You and her will never match. Your death will be known by those who remain, those who will “live” it, and the only thing that will live will be your absence and they will not know where you went. Nobody knows. No one can guarantee that you will go elsewhere beyond the crematorium of your remains, but neither can anyone guarantee that they will not transcend, that you will not transform into another dimension.

That is why I prefer to call that last day “the farewell”. I want to call it that, “the farewell”. And then I ask: What is a farewell? Who stays? Who is going? Who will notice the absence? You do not! You won’t be there to lament. You will have traveled You will be elsewhere or you will not be anywhere and in any case you will not suffer. Stripping death of suffering is also defeating it.

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Death is a problem for those who stay. Your death is someone else’s problem. Instead, your life is your business, so live your life! For those of us who are part of that army of millions of hopefuls who advance with the blessing of faith as a protective shield, it is impossible to fear death because we know that there is life beyond this life; but to the agnostics, whom I respect, I invite you to listen to Epicurus of Samos, who taught us 2,300 years ago:

Death is something we should not fear, because while we are, death is not, and when death is, we are not.

book cover dancing with deathedited by Aguilar.

You say goodbye when you travel. The others stay. There is no death, there is farewell. You can say goodbye or see you later, but your journey continues. Life itself is nothing more than a journey that can be wonderful or can turn out to be a disaster depending on how you manage it., as you plan, as you decide, as you assume. “This is what it is”, said an old neon sign in a bar, build your trip with that. And get new things, look for them, build them, take ownership of your life.

On this journey of life you meet people. You laugh, you cry, you dream, you drink, you bite, you eat or swallow, you penetrate, they penetrate you, the body and the mind, others and others, you speak, dialogue, listen; You hear music, birds, silence, sunrises are free, you can stretch out in the morning, walk, run, throw yourself on the meadow, on the sand, on the water, on the body of another, you can see, without seeing, observe with emotion or interest, you can waste your glances but also imagine what does not exist, you can even create fantastic worlds, characters, dreams, symbols, you can make future plans, turn ideas into projects and projects into reality, you can fall and get up, you can always return to start, you can invite others to your journey through life, or travel alone, you can guide or be led, you can take by the hand. Each color, each smell, each flavor can be new or it can be the last and therefore you can enjoy it or swallow life without savoring it.

This is not an essay about life but about death, so I am not going to dwell on the debate about other pleasures and other sufferings. The pessimistic and embittered, the hurt and offended, the beaten and excluded, the victimized and run over by other indolent and unfair powerful ones, by abusers inside their home or outside everywhere, the humiliated by those abusive dominators, will say entrenched in valid reasons that life is not a wonderful journey but an unbearable shit full of problems and anguish, lack and injustice. And they can stay the rest of their lives in that trench, in that bitter hole, or go out to look for the light, to change everything.

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We all have problems. Many suffer much more than most, however, the sun rises for everyone and we almost always forget that on this day, if you are part of the vast majority, of which we are anyone, You also have privileges that life gave you and that others do not have, you can go for a walk, see, smell, hear, drink fresh water, probably taste some favorite food, hug your children, smile, rebel and reveal yourself as you are, as you can become. How you deserve to be I feel sorry for those who prefer to complain and let life go by. That they swallow it without tasting it. That they let each day go by without enjoying it, when you have to enjoy each day passionately as if it were your last, as if you were enjoying a unique show to which you had the privilege of being invited and that you may never see again. I invite you to my dance. I dance with life and now I dance with death. And to the sound that they touch me… I dance!

To dance with her is to defeat her. It’s taking it at your pace. It is not to fear him. Like the girl at the teenage party that you had to ask to dance, but you didn’t know her. Dare yourself. She asks her to dance. Seduce the bald one, the skinny one, if you had to dance with the ugliest one, the bony one, the skinny one, convince her to see each other later… and then leave her sitting, leave her and keep going, keep dancing, get on with your life. Don’t let her distract you. She will have to wait. You are busy enjoying your life.

From his book: ‘dancing with death‘ (Editorial Aguilar)

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